Self-Doubt

It is something that we all struggle with and this week it is something that I have been really hit by.

In comparison to other people, I would say that I find academic things come more naturally to me. This means that I don’t have much academically to be doubting myself about but sometimes it is the throw away comments made by others that just cause me to think twice about myself and my abilities.  We can all be guilty of making these comments, just as much as we can be on the receiving end of them. Howbeit, they can really bring a person down and make them believe that they are not good enough.

This is why I have come up with some top tips as to how not to be brought down by those throw away comments that can bring you down:

1. IGNORE IT! The majority of the time, the people making these comments do not even realise they are saying things that could be upsetting. This means that they are not intending to bring you down. So there is no need to take any notice.

2. DON’T BELIEVE IT! We are all unique, meaning that we all have different talents and abilities. Therefore, there is no need to believe that you are not good at anything because you are good at something, it just may not be (and probably won’t be) what the person making the comment will be good at. Take my brother and I, for example. I enjoy studying and have passed every exam I have sat but I cannot farm and look after animals to save my life. My brother, on the other hand, is super good at farming and loves looking after the sheep and cows but struggles more than I would academically.

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This is not Joel, but he would happily do something much like this 🙂

3. MOVE ON! There is no need to take the baggage with you along the way, so drop it as soon as you get it! You might as well because otherwise you will just be brought down and get upset about a comment someone has made. Hence, you should just get up and carry on with life.

Hope this helps!

And remember, you’re amazing just the way you are. (Cue cheesy song line from Bruno Mars)

I’m going on an adventure!

It is official now… I am going on an adventure!

I mean, I know I have been getting ready for this adventure for a while but the excitement is seriously building now that my tickets to East London, SA are booked! I didn’t quite realise just how excited I was until I looked at the ticket – cue excited face and silly noises.

 

One of the things that I am really looking forward to whilst is SA is the food. We all know that South Africans do food well and those braais are just calling out to me. For my English friends, a braai is basically a BBQ on steroids. Honestly, we have nothing in comparison! Only this evening, I was discussing this fact with my parents; South Africa is definitely where I am supposed to be because they always eat my kind of food, especially where I am going – braais, pizza, cake… Mmmmmm 🙂

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The Humble Braai
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Another fine example of why South Africa is where I am supposed to be!

 

But more importantly than food (although that is pretty difficult!), I am going to be living with some pretty awesome people – the De Bruin family pictured below. I already feel like part of the family, they have a pizza oven in their house (obviously not the same sort of health and safety restrictions as over here) and they love board games and cake! I do feel as if this is God certifying the fact that this is where I am supposed to be!

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Arno and Claire
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Keegan, Chloe and Josh

So, needless to say, I am looking forward to my adventure.

Happiness Journal Pt 4

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I LOVE BOARDGAMES!

That is just a fact. They are the best thing ever. They are entertaining, you can learn something new and you can have a bit of a giggle.

When I drew the picture for my Happiness Journal, I had played ‘Star Wars Monopoly’ very recently and we needed so much tea, diet coke and chocolate buttons just to keep us going! Monopoly takes so much time and if we didn’t have anything, I am sure I would not be sat here writing this (okay, that is a slight exaggeration, but it did take a very long period of time)!

I also really love it when it gets to the point in the game where going to jail gets fun because it means you don’t have to spend money for the next few goes!

This makes me happy!

Motivation…

So now that we have reached that point in the year when teachers are making mock exams out to be the most important thing in your life, I have no motivation what so ever to even concentrate. It’s not that I don’t like college, because I really do, but I know the things I have planned for this year and I just want them to come quicker! Part of it probably just the fact that A Levels are really difficult and the things that I am planning on doing in the short term (like going to South Africa) do not actually require me to get any grades.

Unfortunately, I have no source of motivation for continuing with year 13 apart from my personal gain. Unlike a lot of other people, I am not planning on going to university in the next 5 years so I don’t require any particular grades like one of my best friends does to be able to study Midwifery. Even people in my tutor group who are choosing not to go to uni still need certain grades to do what they want to do, so I am a unique case!

I know in my head that I would be quite happy to work in an office as a secretary and I know that I would enjoy that sort of thing, it would be a bit like being Dawn from ‘The Office’, but there is a reason I have not planned that far in advance. I know that God has the best plan for my life and although I don’t know what all of that entails, I do know that finishing my A Levels is probably going to help me in the long term. I will just let Him tell me what to do and when.

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Tim and Dawn from ‘The Office’ UK

So, even though I am struggling to find any form of motivation, and because I legally have to stay in education until 18, I am not going to pull out of something that I have been working hard to achieve for so long. As well as this, I know that I have people around me that will encourage me to keep going and try my hardest.

P.S: My tutor definitely needs a shout-out for the best motivational speeches and for telling me that I need to do what I feel is the best things for me.

Happiness Journal Pt 3

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I love it when you are allowed to leave work just that little bit early… It means that I am allowed to get more sleep. If you can remember, my first entry into my ‘Happiness Journal’ was that sleep makes me very happy. This means that if I get an extra hour or so in bed due to leaving work early, I am a very happy bunny. It also means that I am less tired and grumpy in the morning, which is a bonus!

You Shall Not Pass Go!

After 2 1/2 hours of Monopoly, I had lost all of my money and had been wiped out by Naomi who had obtained half the board and had placed hotels on practically everything. It started off well but after Naomi had acquired the browns, the pinks, the greens, the dark blues and 3 out of 4 of the pod racers (it was Star Wars Monopoly of course) and after 2 cups of tea and a can of Diet Coke she had won. Maybe it was because she was the banker and I had to have 3 toilet breaks!

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Naomi winning at Monopoly

Obviously, after a morning of super hard work to try and keep with with Naomi’s amazingly skilful Monopoly playing, hunger began to creep in. The food just took longer to cook than anticipated so by 2:30pm we were really, really hungry! But it is okay, it was worth the wait, it food was yummy: some crazy form of pizza and mozzarella and pesto dough balls. Yes, it was as good as it sounds!

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Crazy pizza & mozzarella and pesto dough balls

 

Happiness Journal Pt 2

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So I guess that it would be silly of me to not share the fact that I am a Christian as that in itself makes me super happy. But, because the act of worshipping my God brings me so much joy, I think it would have been foolish of me to gloss over it.

For those of you who aren’t sure what worship is, it is defined as the ‘feeling or expression of adoration for something and/or someone’ and for Christians that can range from dancing around your bedroom and singing songs to reading the Bible and listening to someone preach; it is an integral part of our walk with God.

As a Christian, worshipping God in all his fullness highlights how awesome and incredible He really is because of the fact that I am able to experience so much emotion in his presence. I am so thankful that He has allowed us to be able to ‘enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise’ (Psalm 100:4). I just have to stand in awe of of the fact that someone so powerful wants to meet with us intimately and lets us come to Him freely, without and fear or shame!

Furthermore, seeing others worship and how God works through that just fills me with excitement and anticipation of the great things he has in store for us.

This makes me happy!